Thursday, 14 August 2008

Day 10 of KP's rule, Part I

(whole article to be read in a geordie accent)

It's 2.28pm, day 10 in the Kevin Pietersen-England house. Some of the housemates are playing in the England Lions match against South Africa. The rest are still in bed.

Matt Prior, replacing Tim Ambrose as wicketkeeper for the One Day Series, has made a match-defying, place-snatching, record run (lbw off Nel's bowling). Big Brother calls Matt to the diary room.

Big Brother: "Matt, how are you feeling today?"

Matt Prior: "Big Brother, I'm normally such a brilliant batsman, that's why my old coach Mooresy chose me. I don't know what went wrong. My average is 21 runs and I only made 1. (sobs quietly into his sleeve).

BB: "Matt, Big Brother is always here for you when you need to talk. Perhaps your wicketkeeping will be a bit better than your batting for the South African innings."

MP: "I hope so Big Brother." (MP leaves the diary room and gets ready to take the field).

The second half of the programme will start after the match is over. Housemates will then have the chance to nominate later today. Head of House, KP, will be immune from nominations.


Anonymous said...

Day 10 KP.
Month 2 KP
Year 0001 KP

Like a new calendar.
Suggest a name, I can't think of a catchy one?

The Nightwatchgirl said...

Nightwatchgirl will think of a good one. Just not right this second.