Saturday, 12 June 2010

World Cup Blues

NWG is on holidays (she does need one after all) and guess where she's decided to go?

New York.

And guess what she's just had to suffer through?

English football.

And guess what she feels about that?

She's just happy to be a cricket fan.

They try hard.

They win (world championships).

They don't select rubbish players (Curly excluded).

They come through.

So NWG is glad to be a cricket fan. And she feels sorry for all those football fans who know nothing of the wonderfulness of cricket and how England is actually good at something in the sporting world.

She has one final point.

USA will not get through the group stage. England played badly because they have too many Ryans on their team.

Note to Fabio: You need to find the football version of Matthew Hoggard.

Tuesday, 8 June 2010

NWG Is Lazy, But Not As Bad As Some

NWG always believed herself slightly lazy - she is a cricket fan after all - the height of laziness, sitting around all day and not doing much.

But then it came as some surprise to learn that the ECB are lazier than NWG.

They've decided that after two Test matches (especially the last one, that was an incredibly gruelling three days) that they should rest Steve Finn.

And instead of the ECB saying that they are lazy and they want to impose their laziness on their team, they've instead started calling it a "strengthening programme."

NWG has therefore decided to provide a glossary of terms the ECB like to use.

ECB: "We haven't decided which bowlers to take to the Ashes."

Translation: "We know exactly who we're going to take right now and we're not changing our minds no matter what happens."

ECB: "Ryan Sidebottom is an asset to the England squad."

Translation: "We put him in the squad to tease him. We need a laugh every now and again."

ECB: " Playing Bangladesh was worthwhile."

Translation: "We make some decent money out of it."

ECB: "We like having diversity in the England team."

Translation: "We don't care where you were born, if you can hold a bat or bowl a ball, you can qualify for England."